29 July, 2008

Here's a fun little revelation...

So I've only got 20 more boxes to go, and I'm finally done with the kitchen, though I do seem to be missing a few of my favorite knives and other small kitchen gadgets. However, what I do have, in abundance, is coffee cups. 28 to be exact.

Two Christmas, one Halloween, one Playboy Club (yay Vegas!), three giant oversized mugs (one stripy, two purple), three Bassett Hound, one Paris (don't remember why, never been there, must have been a gift), one made entirely of corn (thank you Virginia), four that match my Target dinner plates, six that match my Libby Glass dinner plates (go Toledo!), one from my old job at EDS, one from my current job at State, one that asserts that I'm the "Bestest BabySitter Ever!" (thanks cousins!), one from San Francisco (thanks E&E), one that has a snowman as the handle (which I suppose could technically be considered Christmas) and one totally random green one.

Best part? I don't even drink coffee!

Good Luck A!

Everyone send good thought's A's way today and tomorrow...she's taking the Bar Exam, which she's been studying for like a madwoman for weeks! Let's send some positive vibes her way, 'cause while I know she's going to do great, she's stressing out!

27 July, 2008

National Do Not Call Registry

So there's one thing I forgot to do for my new apartment...register my new number with the Do Not Call List. How did I remember this you might ask?

This morning, at 7am on a Sunday, I got a phone call from a guy calling himself "Pastor Z" and telling me that he wanted to pray with me, for my immortal soul. When I told him in the politest way possible that I really just wasn't interested, he asked me why not. I told him that I was Catholic, and I prayed for my own "immortal soul" at church, and that I didn't appreciate him calling and waking me up at 7am on a Sunday...long before I needed to be awake to go to church. His response:

"Catholic! You're going straight to hell little missy!"

Umm...no, I'm going straight to my computer to register my phone on the National Do Not Call list Mr. Big Bucket Fulla Crazy Preacher Man!

Even as a somewhat religious person myself, I have to admit...religious zealots are creepy!

Warning Labels

Okay, since the move I've been buying lots of random stuff for the new apartment, and I've been doing a lot of "some assembly required." Now I'm all for warning labels, and I love the really stupid ones, because you just know they were forced to put them on there by some idiot who tried to use their product in a completely asinine way.

"Removing the wheel can influence the performance of the bicycle"

Really? Ya think?

On the car sun screen that I just bought for life in Florida: "Do not drive with shield in place."

Wow. How out of it do you have to be to try that?

On my iPod: "Do not eat."

Who's the brain trust that tried that??

So I thought I'd seen it all in terms of stupidity, and maybe I have, but now warning labels have turned just plain cruel. I was putting together a cabinet for the bathroom, when I came across this label:

"Your children will be killed by falling furniture."

What?? Seriously?? Now that's just mean! It's like my cabinet was made by a sadistic Chinese fortune cookie baker! Who writes this stuff?

25 July, 2008

Rant on Living in Florida...

Well kids, its my first rant on living in my new town! Quite the momentous occasion! Here we go:

Driving here, while better than driving in DC in a vast and myriad number of ways, is also, at times, like driving in freakin' Mexico! There was an accident on 95 today that closed down the three left lanes. Now luckily (or so I thought) I was getting off at one of the first exits, so it seemed to me that I'd be fine.

Not.

So.

Much.

Someone (by which I mean everyone on the freakin' road!) decided that we could turn the MERGE lane into not one, not two, but THREE LANES!!! THREE LANES!! OUT OF A MERGE LANE!! IT'S LIKE THE LAWS OF BOTH TRAFFIC AND PHYSICS CEASED TO EXIST! AND EVERYONE IN THE NEW THREE LANE MERGE WAS LAYING ON THEIR HORNS, ALL INSISTING THAT THEY HAD THE RIGHT TO BE WHERE THEY WERE, BUT NO ONE ELSE DID!!

At least in Mexico it's just assumed that you're going to turn a two lane road into an eight lane road and no one bothers to honk incessantly! If anything it's once or twice and then done! I think I may be getting a migraine from sitting in an hour's worth of that cacophony!

Grr...

Rant off.

24 July, 2008

More Musings on My New Town...

Passed a sign on the side of a building today on my way to the store.

Mona's
Tattoo
Insurance

The sign (all in the same colors, directly on top of each other), just made me crack up laughing for the rest of the afternoon. What would a place called Mona's Tattoo Insurance sell? If you don't like your tattoo, you get your money back? They pay for laser tattoo removal? Who comes up with this stuff?


Now I'm guessing (hoping) that it's probably three separate businesses. A place called Mona's, a Tattoo Parlor and an Insurance company. But still...gotta love this town!

20 July, 2008

Observations on living in a new town...

So I've been in Fort Lauderdale exactly one week now, and while I'm enjoying many aspects of my new home, while still missing all my DC friends, one particular thing I've noticed is that traffic here is way, way, WAY less crazy than it is back in DC! I can hop on the expressway at 5pm and expect to be moving the whole way home! NUTTY!! Now granted, I might not always be going 70mph, but MOVING...that's revolutionary for me!

So there I was Friday morning, driving along heading to the office when I stopped at a railroad track as a train passed by. This should have been a perfectly normal event, not worth mentioning, and certainly not worth blogging about. If anything, it would perhaps just be a story about how embarrassed I was to be caught singing Looking Glass' "Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)" by my fellow commuters. (Yeah, that's right, I like me some 70's pop with the Jersey Shore sound, what're you gonna do about it?)

Instead of embarrassment, I was treated to a free show (much preferred, believe me...)! For reasons still unknown to me (or any of my fellow motorists), an old man driving a Toyota Camry rolled down his windows and started screaming bloody murder and gesturing emphatically at the younger man next to him in the Ford 4x4. They continued yelling and even went so far as to get OUT of their cars and meet in the middle of the road to continue yelling! Of course, being the nosy little girl that I am, I rolled down my windows and turned off my radio to see if I could hear/understand what it was they were yelling about. For the record, it's much harder to read lips in a rearview mirror than one might think! I never got the chance to really understand exactly what it was that the two were fighting about, though I kept hearing the words "traffic infraction" from the old man, because the train passed and we all started driving forward.

As I pulled away from the still screaming duo in the middle of the road and heard the cacophony of honks from the unfortunates stuck behind the two, I smiled. No matter where you go, some things never change. I can rest sure in knowledge that the crazies will follow me wherever I go!

It's oddly comforting!

19 July, 2008

Just in case anyone was wondering....

Living in a place that has a 24hr valet service.....TOTALLY ROCKS!!

I went to Ikea this afternoon, followed by the grocery and a few other miscellaneous errands, and when I got back to the apartment, my car was FULL to bursting of really heavy boxes and groceries. So I rolled on up to the valet area, hopped out of my car, handed over the keys, told the guys my apartment number, and they said they'd be up ASAP!

And they were!!

And I didn't have to do anything but tip them, which for lugging this quantity of crap around, I'm MORE than happy to do! Boyfriend? Who needs a boyfriend, I've got 24hr. valet service!

18 July, 2008

Okay, since I can't put up pics of my apartment yet...

Since I'm nowhere near done unpacking, I can't yet show you pictures of my fabulous new apartment, but in the meantime.....How about pics of the fabulous views from my balcony??

First...the Fort Lauderdale Skyline and the Galleria Mall:



Second...the beautiful Intercoastal!



And last but certainly not least....the Ocean!!



Okay, yes, it's through trees, off to the side and a block away, but still....ocean! Didn't have that in Ohio OR Virginia!

16 July, 2008

Okay, forgot one more thing...

If you haven't seen it already, check out Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

I know, I know, sounds super cheesy, right?

Well it is.

But in the BEST way possible.

It's written by Joss Whedon (he of Buffy, Firefly and Serenity fame, at whose feet I unabashedly worship) and stars Neil Patrick Harris (he of Doogie Howser MD and How I Met Your Mother fame, and who I had an eensy crush on as a little girl.) and Nathan Fillion (he of Firefly, Waitress and Desperate Housewives fame and who is, well, super cool himself!).

The basic story is that Dr. Horrible is an aspiring super-villain, whose attempts at villainy are constantly thwarted by his nemesis, the heroic Captain Hammer. He must take his efforts to the next level in order to get into the Evil League of Evil while also mustering the courage to talk to Penny, the girl at the laundromat.

And it's a musical.

Did I mention I love Joss Whedon?

I love Joss Whedon!

So, check out the website, where you can watch each Act for free as they're released. Act I is out now, Act II comes out tomorrow, and Act III comes out on Saturday. After the 20th they'll no longer be available online, but they will be available on iTunes, where you can get all three of them for the low, low price of $3.99, and later they'll be released on DVD. Read The Master Plan for more details on why Joss decided to do this.

The show is completely hysterical, and it comes with the CW5H2O official seal of approval. Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

First Day of Work



Okay, first things first....my pretty pretty flowers are blooming! Waking up and stumbling bleary-eyed into the kitchen, the smell of fresh-cut blooming lilies is a pretty nice thing to wake-up to in the morning. Not a total substitute for my morning Barry's Tea fix, but at least ensures that I'm not pouring hot water on my hand vice the mug!



Secondly, I had my first real day of work at the new assignment today. Everything went without a hitch, I found the place with no problem, all my new coworkers seem really nice, and the job appears to be what I thought it was. I still miss my old friends like crazy, and it's a little outside my comfort zone, but that's what change is all about, right? I'm sure I'll jump right in and hit the ground running. Here's hoping anyhow! Now, I've got dinner plans, and must unpack a few more boxes before that happens, so I've gotta run. No crazy stories yet, but I haven't met all my neighbors yet, there's gotta be a few crazies amongst them, right? After all, I seem to be flypaper for freaks wherever I go, and there's sure to be a couple freaks in Florida!

15 July, 2008

Aww...........

I got flowers!!



Thanks very much to M&D for sending me the beautiful lilies as a housewarming present! I got back to the apartment after a very long day of running around like a crazy person going to the DMV (not any better in FL than in the rest of the US, in case anyone was wondering), the grocery, Target and all my other errands, and sitting there at the front door was a box from the florist. Of course I thought at first that it was a mistake, after all, who would be sending me flowers, I just got here! But then it was my name on the label, and a card from M&D inside. It really was the greatest way to brighten up my day, and they look beautiful in my new kitchen...makes me a much happier unpacker, so thanks you two, it really means a lot. I can't wait to see them as they bloom!

Do I have the best friends or what??

For the record:

Unpacking is hard. Nothing is where I think it should be, I'm surrounded by 137 boxes and I don't like it.

That is all.

14 July, 2008

Moving: Done!

Okay, just a quick update, my computer is unpacked, I'm all internet'ed up, and I'm sitting at my Pottery Barn Desk staring out my new home office window at the beautiful Ft. Lauderdale skyline. Of course, I'm surrounded by 137 boxes (that's not a C exaggeration, it's an actual number from the list I checked off as the movers came in.) in various stages of unpackedness, as the moon shines down through the clouds and lightning flashes in the distance over the ocean. All in all, not a b ad place to live, we'll see how things progress from here. For now, I'm beat and have an appointment at 0 dark 30 tomorrow morning at the DMV to get my brand-spanking-new Florida driver's license. Good times. G'night!

12 July, 2008

Moving: Day Two

Well, it's officially day two of my drive to my new home, and I'm still in some pretty seriously hardcore denial. I can't believe I'm moving...I suppose it'll all seem more real when I arrive on Monday and all my stuff is moved into my new apartment, but for right now, I'm hitting the denial train pretty hard. My going away party was Thursday night, and it was incredibly difficult. Every time someone left, I got a little more emotional, and kept having to run off to the kitchen to "check on something" despite the fact that I'd finished all the cooking before any of the guests arrived. Luckily, my friends were either too wrapped up in the party, or too kind to say anything, or simply came into the kitchen, let me lean on them for awhile and didn't even say anything snarky. Textbook perfect reactions, do I have the best friends or what? I'll miss you guys. :) They even covered for me at work the next day by telling the folks who hadn't been able to make it that I'd "held it together really well." Thanks guys.

On a lighter note, South Carolina is a very strange state. I entered the state this morning, around 10am, and discovered that the billboards for South of the Border that I'd been seeing for the last 100 miles or so were actually for a very strange little theme park. Everything was shaped like a sombrero, and I think I can honestly say that I've never seen a theme park with an "adult entertainment" section before. SHUDDER! I don't even want to know.

As if that wasn't bad enough, a few miles later, I crossed over, I kid you not, The Great Pee River. Who in South Carolina is in charge of naming stuff, and what will it take to fire them? So obviously, I texted all my friends immediately, who found this all very amusing. About a mile after The Great Pee River, I stopped off at a rest area to, well, you know. Only to find that all the restrooms were broken.

Let me just say that again, for emphasis. The rest area, by The Great Pee River, has no working bathrooms. Wow.

About 50 miles past The Great Pee River, I passed a sign for the Whatsit River. Now that's just plain laziness.

When I finally crossed into Georgia (thank God!), I stopped in Savannah to take advantage of a suggestion from a former Georgian friend of mine to stretch my legs along The River Walk and explore a great southern city a little. It was the perfect thing to break up the day's journey, and after having my fill of pralines and watching the live jazz band on the river, I drove on to Jacksonville, where I've stopped for the night. Yes, that's right, I'm officially in Florida. I should reach my final destination by tomorrow evening, where I'll spend one final night in a hotel and then move into my new apartment on Monday. I'm ready to be done with moving. At a certain point, hours and hours alone in a car with nothing to occupy you but music and thoughts of the people you've left behind. Well, I'm ready to leave this melancholy stuff behind and be happy and excited about the new job. As I said to T the other night, that's one of the benefits of being a girl. You can be crying hysterically over the same thing that you're thrilled and excited about. We are nothing if not a study in contradictions. Anyhow, I think I've taken up the only working internet terminal in the hotel for long enough. The next time you hear from me, I'll probably be reporting from my new home office in my new Florida beach house! Have a good night everyone!

09 July, 2008

It's been a rough day....

The move is stressing me the hell out, add to that personal and family drama, plus having to deal with getting my car fixed and the mechanic trying to hose me b/c I'm young and single, and when this song came on the radio, I just started laughing hysterically, because it was so completely and totally appropriate. What I really need today is a good friend and a glass of wine. So with that, I'm off to SMT's place where we're going to grill up some steaks and then head out to a happy hour. Happy Wednesday everyone.

Good Friend and A Glass of Wine
LeAnn Rimes

Who died and crowned me everybody's everything
I'm even busting my butt through the weekend
By the time I get home there's not an ounce of sanity
Between the dogs, my momma's calls
Is it against the law
For me to get what I need?

A good friend and a glass of wine
Someone to say it's gonna be alright
A good friend and a glass of wine
A little pick me up to get me through the night
We talk trash n' we laugh and cry
That kind of therapy money can't buy
Every now and then, every now and then
Every girl needs a good friend and a glass of wine

I don't need to jet off to no vacation for a week
I'd be happy to have a happy hour
When I'm tired and I'm fried it gets me right back on my feet
Any kind of red or white, a little sister time
It's every smart girls secret

A good friend and a glass of wine
Someone to say it's gonna be alright
A good friend and a glass of wine
A little pick me up to get me through the night
We talk trash n' we laugh and cry
That kind of therapy money can't buy
Every now and then, every now and then
Every girl needs a good friend and a glass of wine

A good friend and a glass of wine
Someone to say it's gonna be alright
A good friend and a glass of wine
A little pick me up to get me through the night
We talk trash n' we laugh and cry
That kind of therapy money can't buy
Every now and then, every now and then
Every girl needs
Every now and then, every now and then
Every girl needs a good friend and a glass of wine

4th of July Rant

Okay, so I know I said I wasn't going to post anything until I got down to Florida, but clearly, once you start blogging, you can't stop. It's like Pringles. I've got a small rant about the 4th of July.

I went down to Iwo Jima to see the National Fireworks Celebration with a group of friends. Fireworks were beautiful, puppies and children were cute, rain was annoying, friends were wonderful, yahdda yahdda yahdda. My story begins at the end of our evening.

We'd decided to metro home, and all went about as smoothly as can be expected, with a billion people trying to escape our nation's capital at the exact same time. That is, until we got off the Metro at Falls Church, and climbed aboard the escalator to go up from the platform, to the walkway that led to our car. Suddenly, as we're about half-way up the escalator with a HUGE crowd of people, the escalator stops.

And people just stand there.

After a depressingly long period of time which seemed like 10 minutes, but was probably only 10 seconds, during which my friends and I proceeded to look at eachother incredulously, we shouted "IT'S STILL STAIRS!!! WALK!!!" At which point, the brainless masses went "Oh!" and started walking up the unmoving escalator (read: stairs).

So I provide this as a public service announcement, since the escalator companies haven't seen fit to post it on a sign somewhere (though I can only assume one is forthcoming. After all, there's a sign in my hotel warning me not to try to blow-dry my hair in the bathtub.): When the escalator breaks down and stops, it's still stairs people, and you can, in fact, WALK up them by putting one plodding foot in front of the other. Thank you.

02 July, 2008

Okay, this one I had to post

I've come to borrow SMT's computer (thanks friend!) to post this small event in my life...I was cleaning the apartment after the movers had taken everything out, and was taking one last load of trash out to the bins, when I came upon a sight that I just HAD to blog about.

As I weave my way through the cars, I see a man walking in the parking lot. He had to be at least 6'7" tall, he towered above all the cars in the parking lot, and I could see he was wearing a wife-beater. Then, to my horror, he came out from behind the cars, and he was wearing......


Wait for it...



Wait for it...



Red and white flower-print DAISY DUKES and a FANNY PACK!!!

I was beyond horrified, and thought for a moment I had gone blind. Sadly, by the time I rushed back into my apartment to grab my camera, he was gone, but I had to share this horrible sight with all my friends. Perhaps it's a good thing that I've decided to get out of our nation's capitol when I did....