28 March, 2010

Final Four!!!

I screamed so loud at the S. Florida Butler Alumni Event that I'm actually a little bit hoarse today! Totally worth it though, to see this amazing Butler team get to the FINAL FOUR!! I'm ridiculously excited, and can't wait for next Saturday! Talk about an amazing homecoming -- Welcome back to Indy guys, great job!!

Now we play Michigan State or Tennessee in the Final Four next Saturday, on home turf in Indianapolis. And you can bet this Butler girl will be watching.


25 March, 2010



Seriously boys, job well done! You gave me some anxious moments there, but that was an incredible game. Welcome to the Elite Eight gents, you deserve it!


08 March, 2010

Dear Sweet Mother of God, WHY??

Well, television has finally gone too far. The National Geographic Channel has created a documentary called "Sizing Up Sperm."

But wait, it's not just an entire television program about sperm (which would be odd enough), it's a program that dresses real people up like sperm, and has them reenact the process of fertilizing a woman's egg. Really? We're that hard up* for good entertainment that we're willing to dress people up like sperm?? On national television**?? Open a book people, do you really need to see grown men and women making fools of themselves trying to fertilize an egg? Or if you do, just go watch this episode of Family Guy***. Honestly now, is anyone planning on watching this show? If so, can you please explain to me WHY????

*That was an unfortunate pun.
**Yes, I understand that making people do random shit they would never do in real life is the foundation on which reality television is based.
***No, I do not watch Family Guy. I did however date a guy who watched Family Guy religiously. It's possible one or two bits of Family Guy trivia remain in the back corners of my brain. I'm working hard to replace them with reruns of Friends, Doogie Howser M.D. and The West Wing.

03 March, 2010

Open Letter to my Building (Part II)

Dear Fellow Residents -

If you go down to pick up a package, and upon opening it, discover that the package isn't yours, the appropriate response is to bring it back. The inappropriate response is to just wait for the front desk to call you and then make one of the security officers come upstairs to get it from you. Can you say lazy? You know what's also lazy? Not checking the address label on the package before bringing it upstairs. Also annoying? Opening the package, seeing that it's full of fabulous, awesome, wonderful bath bombs, and USING ONE because you're "curious." Not cool neighbors, NOT COOL.

Your Really Cheezed Off Neighbor

Dear Front Desk People -

I don't mind so much that you gave my package to the wrong person (though in the future, if you could not do that anymore, that'd be super-awesome.), I'm a little more annoyed that when you realized what you'd done, rather than being upfront and telling me: "It looks like we gave your package to someone else by mistake, we'll find out who it was and get your package back as soon as possible." You decided instead to whisper anxiously back and forth between yourselves, while furtively stealing glances at me to see if I was still looking at you. Yes, I'm still looking at you. You know why? Because you haven't acknowledged my existence anytime in the five minutes since you realized that you screwed up. So yes, I'm going to continue to sit here with a serene smile on my face, making you feel uncomfortable. And when you come over and stand in front of me flipping through the book of packages, and STILL don't talk to me? Yes, I'm going to call you out on it. "I assume you gave my package to someone else, given that neither of you has spoken to me in five minutes, and you keep looking anxiously in my direction. Is that fair?" Seriously folks, I'm not going to bite. I really don't care that much about the mix-up. It happens. You're all very nice people, and I'm not going to yell at you or anything. But be upfront with me. Or at the very least, tell me to hang on for a second while you figure out what happened.

A Bemused Tenent

P.S. I may not yell at you, but I'm not above posting a snarky blog entry about it. Kisses!!

01 March, 2010

Open Letter to my Building

Dear Neighbors -

Please stop leaving your drivers licenses in the mail room. I don't know what possessed three of you to leave your DLs down there in the last week, in plain view of the entire world, and I'm reasonably certain that our mailboxes still require keys, not photo ID and biometrics. If you don't start being a little more aware of where you leave your ID, someone much more devious than I is going to take it, and you're going to wind up either A) with a stolen identity, B) called in for questioning in an underage drinking bust, or C) called in for questioning in an illegal immigration case. Whichever way it goes, I imagine it won't be terribly fun (For you. I'll be the one laughing from her balcony.).

Dear Building Courtesy Officer -

I know it's PC to say that you don't see color when you look at people, but I'm reasonably certain that I don't look like: A) a 6'6" African-American man, B) a 4'9" Asian woman, or C) a 350lb Mexican man. When I turn in these drivers licenses, please stop asking me if they're mine. I've officially lost faith in the "ID check" your employees do when allowing people into the building.

All the best,
A Disillusioned Tenant